CULTURE, LEARNING and TEACHING

Diving in the Maldives

February 9, 2010

More than my fear of heights is my fear of being under water. And so going for my first deep sea dive was somewhat of a milestone for me. I have never been inside the sea except in calf-deep waters along a beach on a calm summer day. But even from the safety of the shore I have been deeply aware of the might of the ocean under the mirror-like calmness of its still surface. I have always feared its heaving force, its mysterious depths, its deepest secrets, the unpredictable direction of its rage.

Not only am I nervous of the sea but I am afraid of having my head under water and not being able to breathe through my nose. My years of yoga practice have trained me to take deep slow breaths through my nose. Now my diving instructor was asking me to breathe only through my mouth. For me to stop feeling the breath in my nostril was akin to not breathing at all. I found myself not only having to unlearn one breathing technique but learn a new way of breathing in just a matter of minutes. And I had to learn it underwater.

So today it was all about trust and surrender at so many different levels – trusting and surrendering to the ocean, my diving instructor, and most of all to myself. There are no words to describe what it took for me to make that first practice jump; to take that first step off the boat and fall into the sea and trust that my universe would still be in order when I surfaced; to put on the regulator and breathe underwater for the first time without letting my nose feel the breath. There were moments when I felt I wasn't going to be able to do it...

But I did. And I found myself under water along a coral reef of incredible beauty on my left, and a deep ravine where the sea bed fell down to over 40 meters on my right. I can only say that as a first time diver this underwater experience felt so unreal that I thought I was seeing the amazing coral, fish, and other marine life as though in a film.

Being underwater was almost hypnotic in a way. Several times I would look away from the sand-covered coral slope and my eyes would be drawn to the sea on my right as it plunged down into darkness becoming intensely deep, mysterious and strangely inviting. There was a part of me that wanted to follow the depths of the ocean and to know its deepest secrets. 

Words by Rumi I had once read came to my mind:

As with the ocean, so it is with life,
Look beyond and further,
And you will surely find
Much more than your eyes can see
Much more than your hands can touch
You may see anew a world
You thought you knew all about.

It was there in the watery depths that I was rediscovering, redefining, and seeing anew the world of my own thoughts, feelings and emotions...